Judge, 1929-03-09 · page 16 of 36
Judge — March 9, 1929 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a humorous poem illustrated with period artwork depicting a bachelor nostalgically reminiscing about past romantic rejections. The speaker reflects by his fireplace on all the women who rejected him—dancers, singers, society girls with names like Rena, Thelma, Doris, and Vilma. The joke is the poem's twist ending: he's actually *grateful* they rejected him ("gave me the gate"), suggesting bachelorhood suits him better than any of those romantic entanglements would have. The illustrations show various stylized female figures and a man lounging contentedly, visualizing these remembered women. This reflects early 20th-century *Judge* magazine humor: gentle satire about modern dating, marriage anxiety, and bachelor life—themes that appealed to young male readers navigating social expectations around courtship and commitment.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE By my hearth as I poke at an ember When the toil of the long day is done, I relax for a while to remember All the sweethearts I've wooed, but not won. They parade, these adorable spectres, And the tale of my youth is retold; Tsee Rena the dancer at Reetor’s, 1 see Thelma with tresses of gold. 1 sce Doris the dulect soprano, And Dolores the heart-breaker I sce Pansy who played the piano, And my Vilma, the queen of croquet. I see mischievous Peggy the prankful, I see serious Selma sedate, Oh, 1 gaze at them all and I'm thankful That they long ago gave me the gate! —Artuur L, Lippmann E\ comicbooks.com