Alfred; or, The Adventures of a French Gentleman — page 182: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

OF A FRENCH GENTLEMAN. FSB | : defiance at the industrious citizens whom he encountered in the shop. He seated himself at a table opposite to a stout, demure-looking personage, whose blue coat and brass buttons, buff waistcoat, and drab small-clothes, betrayed the substantial tradesman at the first glance. Belle-Rose could not avoid a smile when his eye wan- dered over the staid tranquil being that was discussing some ox-tail with a certain relish, and was qualifying it through the med:um of a glass of iced punch, while all his motions appeared rather the mechanically-forced efforts of an automaton, than the spontaneous activity of a living thing. ‘¢ Your soup, sir!” said a waiter to Belle-Rose: and although the self-dubbed count did not exactly comprehend the words of the domestic, a certain savory mess, now standing before him, recalled his attention from the singular figure opposite. But, no sooner had he applied the first spoonful to his lips, than the scalding heat of the turtle made him drop the spoon, expectorate the few drops he had taken, strike the table with his hand in a paroxysm of mingled agony and rage, and stamp his foot violently on that which he thought was the floor: it however fell with all its weight on the corns of the gentleman on the other side of the table, and caused that hitherto silent personage to give vent to so terrible a cry, that the waiters ran towards him with open mouths and staring eyes to ascertain the origin of his agony. Belle-Rose, whose pain was instantly forgotten when he heard the dismal yell, burst into a ht of laughter at the comical face of his neighbour. This only in- creased the wrath of him whose toes were so peculiarly sensitive ; and at length, unable to contain his indignation, he, in the veritable spirit of a true Englishman, raised a fist that might have floored an ox, and levelled the diminutive Frenchman with the ground. Belle-Rose started up, his face purple, and his eyes flashing fire: but the timely interference of a policeman put an end to the war- fare, and obliged the offending and the offended parties to follow jiim to the Mansion House, where the Lord Mayor was sitting at the moment on the magisterial bench, in order to dispatch a few cases of trivial consequence. The police-ofticer stated the position in which he discovered the two belligerents ; and the city-monarch proceeded to investigate the case. ‘* What is your name ?”’ said he, addressing the Englishman. ‘¢ Daniel Higgins, please your lordship,” was the reply, accomn- anied by a respectful salutation. | ‘¢ Well, then, Mr. Daniel Higgins,” continued the Lord Mayor, with an emphasis that created a general titter in the court, ‘* you will be so kind as to state simply, and in as few words as possible, the origin of the dispute.” ‘¢Why, your lordship,” answered Mr. Higgins, scratching his head, and winking his left eye, ‘‘ I am a peaceable citizen, wot deals in the grocery-line, and I lives in Mark-lane. Having some business on Cornhill this morning, I sallies forth, and bends my way towards the place of rendi-woo (rendezvous); but as I was summat too early, and as Mister Michael Lobkins, the tanner, whom CORNICE OOOKS (EO)