Ellen Percy; or, The Memoirs of an Actress — page 104: what you’re looking at

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ELLEN PERCY; OR, THE MEMOIRS OF AWN ACTRESS. 91 ~~’ one of the trees and therewith baited the trap. | the world—a sage of such wonderful erudition But the Musical Musk-Rat only played heedlessly | that all the Universities put together could not about, as before—and did not even take the | form an ageregate of knowledge eqnal to that slightest notice of the Princess. Then she plucked | which was enclosed within his brain. No wonder, & pomegranate, and substituted it for the orange. | then, if the arrival of so profound a sage produced Still without avail! In short, she tried all the an immense excitement in the royal dwelling! fruits of the garden successively—but still without | effect; so that reduced to despair, she flung herself weeping into her grandsire’s arms.” * But if the rat had the run of the garden,” I said, “and could freely devour the fruits as he of so famous a scholar. The orchestra played a slow and solemn strain as the Professor entered upon the stage “7 “ What was that for?” I asked. “To give the g ester effect to the appearance He was clad in a long thought fit, it was scarcely to be supposed that he black gown covered with hieroglyphies and mystic would be attracted by those self-same fruits when placed in a golden cage?” “Well, the rat certainly was not attracted to the cage, Miss Trafford,” answered Mr. Jingleton ; “and everybody was reduced eo Seapets. One Lord | of the Council suggested that the trap should be | baited with jelly or blancmange—another proposed trifle—a graye bishop thought that tipsy-cake would have the desired effect—the Lord Mayor of the capital insisted upon the efficacy of turtle— an alderman spoke of venison—a fat school-boy proposed mince pies. All these things were tried in succession. Hour after hour the trap was filled with a varying succession of delicacies : but the rat took not the slightest notice thereof. The King was almost worn out with grief: the Princess was reduced to despair: the courtiers, the heralds, the guards, and the people stood transfixed as statues in mute ineffable woe. Tableau accordingly. End of the fourth scene.” | _ “I do not wonder,” I said, “that the Princess Mimosetta was reduced to despair—for I assure you that I very nearly am!” | “Ab, no doubt, Miss Trafford!” observed the dramatic author: “all your tenderest sympathies are enlisted—you can feel for that poor Prin- “TI hope her woes are ended ?” I said. “You shall hear,” resumed Mr, Jingleton. “Scene fifth and last. A sumptuous room in the — symbols; and he had a high-pointed black cap upon | his head, decorated with the signs of the Zodiac. His long white beard reached below his waist ; and he carried a huge black-letter volume under his arm.” “Rather a strange figure,” I said, “to be seen walking about in the streets of a city.” ** Ob, but he was a philosopher!” exclaimed Mr. Jingleton. “Ah, true! I forgot! Of course, a philosopher cannot be dressed like any other rational person. But pray proceed: I am now all anxiety to arrive at the denotiement.” “Ah! I knew you would be,” exclaimed the author, quite rejoiced at the degree of interest which he flattered himself had been excited within me. “The denotiement is grand, I can assure you! Indeed, the whole of this last scene is so arranged as to conduct the drama with solemn and stately march to the happy conclusion. You shall see, Professor Wiseacre enters the royal apartment, and is conducted by the King to a seat of honour. Then his Majesty tells this great philosopher the whole story from first to last; and the sage listens with that erudite and profoundly learned expres- | sion of countenance which shows that an appeal to bis wisdom will not be made in vain. At length the King winds up his doleful narrative by ex- plaining how the golden trap has been vainly baited with jelly, blancmange, cream, trifle, tipsy- palace. Door in the centre, opening on the garden, | cake, turtle, venison, plum-pudding, mince pies, ’ where the rat is seen playing. The is on the threshold of that open door. olden trap | ) | : f is baited | imaginable dainty has been fruitlessly placed with gooseberry tart and custards: but the rat| within that golden trap. gooseberry tart and custards—in short, how every More erudite, if pos- takes no more notice of these luxuries than he did | sible, grows the philosopher’s look—more sage the of any of the former delicacies, The King the | expression of his eyes, as seen through the cir- Princess, with their whole Court, are assembled in| cular glasses of his great horn spectacles. The : ; " j ’ ; the apartment, together with heralds, guards, and | people.” “The people always seem to hang about their | King in that island,” I said. “Naturally so: they deeply sympathize with suspense which prevails is awe-felt to a degree ! ‘The case is a difficult one,’ says the learned man, speaking in the most solemn tone: ‘but the diffi- culty is not insuperable. The question is how to bait the trap? NowTI should not have tried in him. He is telling his counsellors that seven days the first instance all the luxuries, the dainties, have elapsed since the golden trap first began to | and delicaciés which have been used. For my part I be baited, and the fulfilment of the vision which | should have beeninclined at the outset to try’ instigated the proceeding seems to be further off ‘ What? what?’ asked the venerable old King, in than ever. As for the poor Princess, she does | terrific suspense.—‘ Speak, O sage! for heaven’s notbing but weep and Jamenf, exclaiming passion- | sake speak!’ shrieked forth Mimosetta, tremen- ately, ‘Oh, Rat! Rat! wherefore art thou Rat? | dously excited: ‘what would you have tried as a It is yery piteous; and at this point the audience means wherewith to bait the golden trap?’— is always deeply affected: there is snivelling in the | Nothing could exceed the look of profound wis- pit, whimpering in the boxes, and downright crying | dom with which Professor Wiseacre gives his in the gallery. All of asuddena domestic entersthe answer. ‘What would I have tried? he says: royal apartment, and announces to the King that | ‘what would I now try? Why, a little bit of Professor Wiseacre, in obedience to the King’s cheese !'—Immiense was the excitement: away ran mandate, has just arrived at the palace. It then | the Lord Chancellor himself to the pantry to fetch appears from what his gracious Majesty says, that the cheese: it is brought—a morsel of the rind is Professor Wiseacre is the greatest philosopher in | put into the trap in place of the godseberry tart lOO) ee ee (E©)