The Mysteries of London, Vol. IV — page 244: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE MYSTERIES OF LONDON. enerish more devotedly than I that avowal of a sincere passion! At that time his personal beauty was suficicnt to ensnare the heart of any maiden, though far less susceptible than mine ;—and I loved him—loved him madly. But a wealthy noble had seen me; and my father beheld with joy the im- pression that I had been so unfortunate as to make upon that patrician’s fancy. Moreover, at that period, my sire was suffering cruel pecuniary em- barrassments$ and the brilliant marriage which he hoped to accomplish for his daughter, appeared tho only means of extricating himself from his difficul- tics, Thus tie suit of the nobleman was encouraged by my father—and [ was induced by tho menaces, the prayers, and the specious reasoning which ho employed by turns to move me,—lI was induced, I say, to tolerate thé visits of the peer, although heaven knows I never could encourage them. Not that his personal appearance was disagreecable—nor that I paused to reflect that his age was more than double my own: no—for he was handsome—very handsome; and, though his years were twice mine, yet he was but in the prime of life. Wherefore, then, did I receive his addresses with loathing ?— wherefore did I implore my father to save mo from an alliance which was so desirable and so brilliant in every worldly point of view? Oh! it was because my heart was irrevocably given to another-—becauso Gilbert Heathcote possessed all my love !” The lady paused, and wiped away the tears which s0 many varied reminiscences had wrung from her ¢yes,—while profound sobs convulsed her bosom. Lord William Trevelyan felt the embarrassment and awkwardness of his position; for it was now past midnight—and he began to reflect that his servants might look suspiciously upon tho fact of this protracted yisit on tho part of a Jady who was still young onough, and certainly handsome ‘enough to afford food for scandalous tongues. Not that Lord William was cither a rigid saint or a stern anchorite in respect to the female sex: but, although unmarried, he behaved with the utmost circumspection, and would never have outraged decency 60 far as to make his own abode the place of an intrigue or gallant rendezvous. Moreover, the love which he entertained for Agnes Vernon had exercised such a purifying—such a chastening influence upon his soul, that he shrank from tho idea of compromising himself by any real impro- pricty, or of becoming compromised by means of any indiscretion which scandal might think fit to attribute to him. Tho lady was however too much absorbed in her own thoughts and emotions to mark how rapidly time was slipping away, or to reflect upon the im- prudence of prolonging her visit. painfully excited, not only by the fears which bac entertained on account of the absence of Sir Gilbert Ueathcoto—but likewise by thereminiscences which had been stirred up in her soul, and the out- pouring of which to sympathetic cars seemed a necessary vent for a bosom so full of sorrow. “Yes, my lord,” sho resumed, after a short pause, her voice still being characterised by a tonc of the most touching melancholy; ‘my father forced me into that hated marriage—and though I gained rank anda proud position, yet hope and happiness appeared to liave forsaken mo for ever. But I cannot tell you all,” sho exclaimed, hastily, as if a sudden thought had struck her, warning her that observed the lady, Her feelings were: 239 tions ofa nature which she would repent, or which would at least be unbecoming and injudicious, “Madam,” said Lord William, emphatically,— I do not seek your confidenco—I do not even desire it: but you have to do with a man of honour, by whom everything you may impart, whether with premeditation or unguardedly, will be held as sacred,” “T thank your lordship for this kind assurance,” * Do not imagine that I wish to force you into becoming the depositary of my secrots, in order to establish a species of claim upon your friendship. No—my lord: I am not selfish—neither am I an intriguer,—only a most unhappy—a most unfortunate woman! But it is becanse you have manifested some little interest in me—becauso you have so generously promised to aid me in clearing up the mystery which surrounds the sudden dis- appearance of one so dear to me,—it is for these reasons, my lord, that IT am anxious to explain so much of the circumstances of my connexion with him, as will convince you that nothing but the sin- cerest affection on my part could have placed mo in a position which the world generally would regard with scorn, I have told your lordship how, loving Gilbert IIcathcote, I was forced into a most inauspicious marriage with another: but the namo of that other I need not mention. My father saw, whien it was too late, that he had indeed sacrificed my happiness on the altar of his own selfishness and he died of remorse—of a broken heart! My husband—my noble husband—was kind and gene- rous towards me: but I could not love him—and he knew it. Then he grew jealous—and other cit- cumstances,”’ she added, casting down her eyes and blushing deeply, “embittered our lives. At length —or, I should rather say, at the expiration of a fow short years, I fled from him—fled from the husband who had been forced upon me—and songht refugo with the object of my heart’s sole and undivided affection. From that moment I have dwelt under the protection of Sir Gilbert IHcathcote,—dwelt in the strictest privacy—happy in the possession of his love—a love which, as well as my own, has known no diminution with the lapse of years. To ono of your generous soul—of your enlightened mind, my position may not appear so degrading—so humili- ating, as it would to ono incapable of distinguish- ing between the heart’s irresistible affection and a mere sensual depravity. Pardon me, my lord, for having thus obtruded this slight, and, I fear, ram- bling sketch, upon your notice: but I could not en- dure the conviction that I must appoar in your eyes to be nothing more nor less than the pensioned mis- tress of your friend, The length of time that Ais lave for ime has endured, may be alono sufficient to persuade you that Iam not to be confounded amidst the conimon mass of female degradation and immo- rality.” “Madam, I thank you for this explanation~and I comprehend all tho delicacy and peculiarity of your position,” said Lord William Trevelyan, rising from his seat, the lady herself having set the example—for it now struck her that she had re- mained until a very late hour. “You will pardon me, my lord,” she said, “ for having thus occupicd so much of yourtime But I know you to be one of Sir Gilbert's best friends— indeed, the one of whom he was principally ae- customed to speak, and whom lie loved and relied ehe was about to be led by her feelings into revela-’ upon the most. 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