The Man in Possession — page 316: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE MAN IN POSSESSION. 311 His agitation made him reckless ; he began to see at last that there might be a deeper depth to his present unhappiness in that future which he had painted to himself in blissful colours. Mrs. Lafaye’s plain speaking had been a great shock to him. He had some grain of good feeling in his nature. He felt a thrill of horror as those words echoed again and again in his ears—‘*‘ It is her throat that will feel the knife.” ‘‘She hates me and no wonder,” he thought miser- ably. ‘‘I oughtn’t to expect her to marry me... I see it now. But yet it’s so beastly hard to give her up.” He tossed and turned in feverish impatience on that couch, cursing his fate and himself, and in such violent perturbation of mind that it was not likely to benefit his physical condition. He knew what he ought to do—what sooner or later he must do; and yet, it was so terribly hard to do it. In all his life he had never made a sacrifice of personal comfort or convenience, and this meant so much more. It meant giving up to another the happiness he had coveted for himself. It meant— everything. In the storm and whirl of his thoughts Kate entered to ask him if he needed anything or would like the nurse to sit with him for an hour. ‘‘I am tired and going to my room,” she added. ‘“ Tired of me, I suppose,” said the invalid sulkily. “You can talk and laugh and be agreeable enough to everybody else, it seems.” _ She looked at him in quiet surprise. ‘‘Surely you COMicloe (Sri C(O)