Avon Fantasy Reader No. 14 — page 93: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ingly asking only one question. “Why was I made?” In the Premier’s hand _ was a watch crystal and on the glass was a new creation, barely a quarter of an inch high, in every respect the exact duplicate of its brother standing by the side of the car. “What does this mean, Professor Owens?” the puzzled Premier asked the Chemistry teacher, “What kind of things are these? They cannot fight. They have no weapons, no brains, no blood. All they know is how to grow and move forward. Evidently they come from Moronia, but for what reason? Is it a declaration of war?” The old Professor answered to the best of his ability and what he said was surprisingly near the truth. “They are just Yeast Men, Your Excellency. I have examined them in every way, chemically and microscopically and they are just peculiarly shaped masses of dough animated by some very active yeast. Their movements resemble dough overflowing a pan. I do not know what they mean, but I do know what they are. I have had one cut up and baked in loaves and it tastes like a fairly good kind of whole wheat bread.” Here the Chief-of-Staff interrupted. “Of course we could consider it as a declaration of war and attack, but what would be the influence on the world’s opinion of us? Reporters would rush in from Paris and London papers. They would make us the laughing stock of the universe. What could we say? That we were afraid of lumps of yeast? That we were using our artillery on potential loaves of bread? So far, these creatures have not committed a single depredation. No lives have been lost, not a house burned, not a single pig or chicken killed. Think what a reporter from an American paper would do to us if he had a chance to write it up? How would he describe our infantry pouring bullets into dough, our brave cavalry men cutting off the heads of the bread men? Far better would it be to take them as fast as we can and distribute them among all our people and let them make bread of them. That would be a joke! The Eupenian na- tion being fed at the expense of the very enemy who hates them so!” “T believe you are right!” answered the Premier. “There is certainly noth- ing in such creatures to be afraid of, though their number seems to be increas- ing hourly. It was all well enough for the ignorant peasants to run in terror from their farms, but the city folk will look on it as a great joke—especially if _ we use the proper kind of propaganda. Suppose we return at once to the Capital and prepare a statement for the press.” The next edition of The Staatsbote, the leading afternoon paper in Eu- penia, ran the following news item on the front page. HAVE YOU A LITTLE YEAST MAN IN YOUR HOME? IF NOT, WHY NOT? All citizens are urged to provide at once their homes with one or more Yeast Men, These peculiar creatures are very harmless and the Department of Chemical Research assures us that they make a very fair quality of bread. They come in all sizes. When little, your children can play with them as dolls; when full sized, they can reduce the High Cost of Living. 91 conmiclibooks.conn