Life — April 5, 1929 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Characters: Dexry Lict,a man-overboard with life. Dory, Ais wife. A Tramp, A Littte Buoy. Act One Seane: A cabin. (Dory is waiting til- ler husband arrives. Enter Derry Lict.) Dory: Didn't I say you miz- zen go out with- out avast on, this kind of weather? Yacht to know _ better! Tack off your hat! Dexxy Lict: [ tug it off! Dory: Launch is ready! You navi- gate home on time! Dexry Lict (muttering): If only we had been married in the companion- way! Dory: Why anchor-y scow-l? Dery Lier (with sudden determina- tion): I aft to go aweigh! Doxy: What fore? Dery Lic: It’s best for boat of us. Doxy: You don’t luff me any more! Derry Lict: Off course I do! I war- ship you! (Aside) That's my stow- away and I'll stick to it! Dory (weeping): I would go home to motor-boat she’s dead! Dexwy Licr (resignedly): Well, I guess I will hove-to stay after all. But first and foremast, brig on the food! Dory (sinking happily): Dhow-de- ow-dhow! (They sit down to table), Dory (tenderly) Compass the soup—I can't reach it, canoe? Derry Lict (indul- gently): Here, you can have a hull dishful! Dory: IT was a freighter let you go —(drinks soup) Dexwy Licr (disap- provingly):; Will you please knot— such a stern and Life Short Stories of Life SHIP AHOOEY! A Row-mance of the Sea By Marian Deitrick Dory: I knew you would schooner or later frigate me—(drinks again.) Derry Licr (bitterly, rising from chair): This, then, is the aftermast of passion! Dory (coolly): Mast you go? Derry Lict: Yaw! Dory: When you are gunwale you drop-a-line sometimes? (Exit Derry Lict.) Act Two Seane: A dinghy saloon in the “Port of Missing Men,” twenty years later. (Derry Lict is seated with a young Tramp, drinking a galleon of wine, and idly shuffling a bridge deck. He is wearing cast-off clothing—a terrible old code (it was bad enough, and then he turret), and his breeches-buoy, you should see them! He has not had abaft for six months... . Two native dancing girls are eyeing the pair craft- ily.) Derry Lict: Ocean these forward winches, my lad! Youn Tramp (reading newspaper): I seaworthy just had an election back home. Derry Lict: Ah, you may seafarer women than your wife, my lad, but wharf you dof wharf you do? Younc Tramp: I wouldn’t mind walking down the Main Stem right now—just Marine me! Derry Lict (shedding a privateer): Ah, poor Dory! Ah, fo’c’s'le think I have deserted her! (Becoming poeti- cal in his g-reef.) My doubts are oar! I shell go back to her once more! We'll have a maritime as of yore! Act Three Seane: Yard of cabin, same as first. (Enter Derry Licr.) Derry Lict: Fifteen billow, but thank God, a windlass night! List! Can that be the old rooster that cruise from the barn? Ark—what is that noise sounding at my heels? A Doc: Barque! Barque! Derry Lict: Why, here’s a little buoy! Collier dog off, sonny! (Beams on child.) You seam to be a ferry nice little buoy! Tell me, whose little buoy are you? (Child indicates window of cabin.) Derry Lict: It’s rude to punt. (Hears voice in cabin.) Voice: Scuppers ready! Dexry Lict (pier-ing through win- dow): Who's this I sea-going to my chair? I can hard-a-lee believe my eyes! Becalm, my heart. Has the wife o’ my bos'n taken a lubber? Lime Buoy: That's her second mate. He was her star-board-er. Derry Lict: Then she masthead news [I was dead! Hah, T will keel the big boom! I will smash his scull! —(Pauses as voice is heard again.) Voice: You never put-out-to-sea if you can please me! You're al- ways railing at me! You are a fuel! Why don’t you put on avast for dinner? Give me the soup! ... (drinks noisily—S/oop, sloop.) Derry Licr (sing- ing softly as he sneaks away down road) THE GAL-LEY LEFT BE- HIND ME. comicbooks.com